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  • Writer's pictureNick C. Goins Jr.

The Pissed Take - Renfield

Release Date 14Apr2023


RENFIELD -or- DRACULA'S BEE'YOTCH: AIDE DU CAMP DES DAMNÉS *AKA* A bloody okay PSA


This movie isn't bad.


RENFIELD is, as horror comedies go, pretty decent. It doesn't ever rise above that, but doesn't really need to. Presented as a modern day continuation of TOD BROWNING's 1931 film DRACULA starring BELA LUGOSI (here NIC CAGE) as the title character and DWIGHT FRYE (here NICHOLAS HOLT) as the tragic madman Renfield, where Renfield isn't killed but remains in servitude to his "not-dead" master.


Renfield serves his master dutifully, finding victims (assholes and shitheels for his own conscience) to rejuvenate the master vampire to full health. He does this by attending a 12-step group for folks in codependent relationships to source abusers for victims. A botched job leads to hijinx and so on... NO SPOILERS.


THE GOOD:

I largely enjoyed this movie, it's a bit rough and not all of the jokes hit - or know when to end, but not bad. Nicholas Holt is sympathetic as a more fleshed out, bug-powered, Renfield. Nic Cage is surprisingly effective as Dracula, even with his f#cked up accent, bringing some nastiness to the role that isn't overbaked. Much of the cartoonish gore is a nice nod to early Peter Jackson splat-fests, and works for the story being told. The message (and there is one) about taking your power back from abusers is effective, this is until…


THE BAD:

IT'S NOT! When this thing starts beating the drum, it's the drum breakdown from Rush's Tom Sawyer... really, you get it about 10 minutes in. AWKWAFINA... I don't know if she's miscast or just not funny, but damn does she land like a rocket powered anvil. The film features several setups for events that really don't come together as much. Not NOTHING, just meh.


SEE IT!

STREAM HO!!! Small screen stuff, not really even a matinee. Yes, not everything deserves an auditorium sparkles, your nature doc about the pooping habits of tree sloths and the dope that watches them deserves YOUTUBE, not the AMC. Cool your nips.


DON'T SEE IT:

You should, it's fun... unless you absolutely MUST finish planning your interactive art display wherein you pose nude in front of a large white canvas with Hebrew National hotdogs and Ho Ho's nailed to it, getting sprayed from fire hoses by the audience with boiling hot, multicolored treacle. You magniloquent zounderkite!

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