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  • Writer's pictureNick C. Goins Jr.

The Pissed Take - Furiosa

FURIOSA: A MAD MAX SAGA -or- PONDEROSA: THIS STEAK IS... NOT GOOD. AKA Another LONG, pretty nothing.


Release Date 24May2024


This movie is not good. It's hardly a movie.


The runtime is there (boy is it). It's got characters in it, camerawork, sound, SFX, VFX - WHERE IS THE STORY? Story makes a movie.


FURIOSA: A MAD MAX SAGA is a prequel story to the Furiosa character introduced in MAD MAX: FURY ROAD (aka MAD MAX: THERE AND BACK AGAIN), a movie that she was functionally the main character in. The movie is the fifth movie by director GEORGE MILLER set in his post-apocalyptic outback series MAD MAX.


This movie was at one point going to be an anime feature, and I'm still not sure if that would have been better.


As this is Furiosa's back story, it follows that this movie is about the life events preceding "Fury Road". That's basically it, a series of plot points - plot ideas really, haphazardly stitched together by action sequences that have exciting parts but aren't really exciting as a whole. F#ckery.


The less air given to the "Go woke, go broke" crowd the better. We get it, you don't want to see the wumerns and the coloreds out of "their place" in your moving pictures. Now see yourselves back to the rubbish bin please. Trash pickup is today.


There is an unnerving sloppiness and cheapness glazed over the entire film. From the much commented over reliance on dodgy CGI (particularly weird is the AI enhanced deep-fake of Anna Taylor Joy over the actors playing young Furiosa), to the uninteresting performances of most of the supporting cast, and finally - the 168 runtime with only an hour of story.


I didn't care much for Fury Road. I thought it was vapid, empty, dumb and pointless. It WAS very pretty. A pretty empty thing. This movie seems to have doubled down on dumb.


THE GOOD:

The design of the film is very cool, one of the things I liked about the last movie. Anna Taylor Joy is pretty good considering how thin everything, including her character, is. Along with Chris Hemsworth gnawing everything in sight, in every scene he's in, they are the only two not doing their best impression of wallpaper.


THE BAD:

Where is the story!? The thing that makes movies worth it? Sure, you can candy up a turd like AVATAR and people will chew it up, but do we need everyone racing to the bottom? Mad Max, the character and world, were about the deconstruction of man, the world, and humanity embodied in the story of a regular dude's life going to shit. The rest is about letting go and finding yourself somewhere new or some shit. This new ass-ery is about... nothing. The deepfake is distracting - especially ATJ's GIGANTIC EYES. Jesus H... The off-brand VFX work reeks of WARNER BROS penny pinching, with a 168 million budget no less. I was tired after watching this.


There was a planned second prequel called THE WASTELAND, that was meant to be a Max focused prequel to Fury Road (why?), but this film's under performance has cast that into doubt. I think it's time to reconsider this franchise's trajectory.


SEE IT:

(Shrugs) If you are a completist, still watch movies in theaters and can't help yourself - sure. Otherwise... STREAM HO!!!


DON'T SEE IT:

Do. Not. Incentivize. MEDIOCRITY. Especially if it comes from Warner Bros and Sony.



Furiosa stands on some skeletons that are trying to attack her. There is a starburst pattern behind her and the overall color of the image is gold.
The Movie Poster for Furiosa

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